{"id":5308,"date":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","date_gmt":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.focusin-holisticlifestyle.com\/we-are-the-sums-of-our-choices\/"},"modified":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","modified_gmt":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","slug":"we-are-the-sums-of-our-choices","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.focusin-holisticlifestyle.com\/en\/we-are-the-sums-of-our-choices\/","title":{"rendered":"We Are The Sums Of Our Choices"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am pretty much convinced at least from my mental map or a mind set, as you like, that we can master our mind and our life with use of questions, statements and commands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When it comes to\nquestions, somebody said once that the key to wisdom is knowing all\nthe right questions. So, what questions do you ask yourself every\nday because they determine the quality of the life you lead. <\/strong>\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why\nis that? Because these questions you will be asking yourself will \ntrigger its own set of answers. Consequently, the answers will lead\nto certain emotions and emotions will then lead to certain actions\n(or inertia) that will be get manifested as results of lack thereof.\nYou may deduce from this analogy that should you keep continue asking\nyourself limiting questions, guess what? You will get limited\nresults. If you ask yourself mind-opening, forwarding questions,\nyou\u2019ll gain a lot more out of them. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, let’s go to the\nmain theme of this post reflected in the title -and beyond. I know\nvery very few people who understand the importance of writing down\ntheir goals. I personally was someone who was very lazy and always\nprocrastinating to start writing down things on the piece of paper\nnot on my PC. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you are like me then\nyou probably write a so called ‘To Do List’<\/strong> for the next day.\nHowever, guess what? It is not enough because we need also a ‘To\nBe List<\/strong>‘ in order to clear on who we need to be to complete the\nitems on the ‘To Do List’. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The underlying process\ninvolves asking the right questions, and making the right statements\nand commands such that you wear the right hat, access and mobilise\nyour resources, engage others and take the required steps to\nachieving the outcome.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We start by bring\nawareness to our state of mind and our behaviour. Awareness is always\nthe key. Then we ask a question, “Is this what I want to be\nthinking right now? Is this what I want to be doing right now<\/em>?”\nIf not then we ask, “What thought would serve me right now,\nor what would I rather be doing right now<\/em>? It’s very important to\nbear in mind that we don’t get into an argument with ourselves. We\njust bring awareness to our thought processes and our behaviour and\nthen pose an appropriate question to the unconscious mind.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once we know what we\nwant to do then we might use a command and say, “Go for a\nwork-out, or to study, or whatever . As you get ready to go to study\nor clean your room , you might make statements to self and say, “I\nam going to walk for thirty minutes and get back in time for dinner”.\nThen you might make a commandand say<\/strong>, “Okay let’s go.\nCommon let’s move”.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So by cunningly using\nquestions, statement and commands we get ourselves from the back seat\ninto the drivers seat of our life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In order words, what we\nexperience and achieve in life is directly related to all those small\ntalks you are having with yourself. Hence, it’s about the questions<\/strong>\nthat you ask yourself, the statements <\/strong>that you make, and the\ncommands<\/strong> that you give yourself. So, how do you want to talk\nto yourself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, coming back to our ”to be list” <\/strong>the key list, having “To do list” is very much OK, however, in my opinion “To be list” is of the utmost importance, at least for me, because it tells us who do I need to be to bring those goals to fruition. So in the same way you need to know what your goal looks like, sounds like and feels like<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The WHO YOU ARE as your the most important question.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Consider\nthis for a moment. You get born. That is a given. You get conditioned\nby your parent, the society; you get an education and then somewhere\naround late teens, parents and teachers start asking you ”what you\nwant to do with your life”. The presupposition is that you should\nchoose something that fits the identity given you by society, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, if you were brought up in a working class family then you would look for a working class type job. If you were brought up in an upper class family then you would move into a career which keeps you in the upper class. For example, I have met a number of people in their late forties who lamented about the job they found themselves in – just because a parent made their career choices for them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The\nlesson is to get clear on your identity as early as possible in life\nsuch that you get on the right track. For if you don’t play an active\npart in defining who you are, then you may end up mixing with the\nwrong people, in the wrong places at the wrong time. So who do you\nneed to hang around with such that you form the type of identity that\nwill support you in achieving what is important to you, such that at\nthe end of each day, and at the end of your life you can turn around,\nlook back and say it was a life well worth lived?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once you clarify who you want to be, who you need to be, then think about what you want to do. So\nhow to build a new identity? I see two ways to approach this\nquestion. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

First,\nlet’s think if you could have whatever you wanted in life then what\nwould this be? For example, if you want to own a X million EUR real\nestates, wear expensive clothes, drive a fancy car, then who do you\nneed to be to acquire those items? In this case you start with the\nWHAT and then move to the WHO and then the steps and stages to\nattain the goals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or, you may ask in this way, WHO do I admire, (who do I envy) , who could I be like, who could I emulate, who do I identify with… Here we are not looking at WHAT THEY HAVE (as in the first approach) but WHO THEY ARE. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

To\nsum up – In order to start your personal process of identification \u2013\nYour ID \u2013 you first need to identify a role model and simply step\ninto the shoes of your role model. Do you already have one? If not,\ndon’t waste your time and attention and go for it! Now! \n<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am pretty much convinced at least from my mental map or a mind set, as you like, that we can master our mind and our life with use of questions, statements and commands. 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