{"id":5314,"date":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","date_gmt":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.focusin-holisticlifestyle.com\/reframe-your-thoughts-reframe-your-life-2\/"},"modified":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","modified_gmt":"2020-05-04T06:55:52","slug":"reframe-your-thoughts-reframe-your-life-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.focusin-holisticlifestyle.com\/en\/reframe-your-thoughts-reframe-your-life-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Reframe Your Thoughts \u2013 Reframe Your Life"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

We can not solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them \u2013 <\/strong><\/em> A. Einstein <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/strong><\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, it’s\ntrue that a life can be quite tough throughout our lives. On the\nother hands, series of misfortune events can also taught us valuable\nlessons that can changed our lives in better . For an example, we can\nlearn that we can decide how we shall be affected by events, or, not\nto be caught in a vicious circle of circumstances thus, becoming\n”victim of circumstances”! I find such a view as useless that serve\nno purpose in our lives but rather to undermine ourselves and our\nmental faculties we have been given to use. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We can learn to choose\nto give more attention to one aspect of a situation than others. The\nlanguage we use is extremely powerful. It is the frame through which\nwe perceive and describe ourselves and our picture of the world. All\nthese is about one of the so powerful NLP techniques called\nReframing. See my previous post on the same subject \nhttps:\/\/bit.ly\/2XPZUOy<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Once\nmastered I consider reframing as an art of changing our perspective\nto see new options that we can equally use with ourselves, but also\nwith unknown people, loved ones, our co-workers, etc. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The fact\nis that humans create mental models of the world in order to\nfunction. These models are sort of frames in which they see and\noperate in the outside world. Frames are bits and pieces of missing\ninformation that can be harmless but can be also very harmful that\ncan easily cause our mental paralysis. That\u2019s where this tactic\ncomes in, when we actually replace an existing and negative frame\nwith a new, positive and emotionally more resourceful for us. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reframing means changing your\nperspective on a given situation to give it a more positive or\nbeneficial meaning to you. It can be useful in lots of different\nsituations, for an example in negotiations (politicians and spin\ndoctors use it a lot<\/em>), whereby reframing both parties so they\ncome to an agreement. It is also very efficient technique in\nempowering people who lack security or self-confidence. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What do we re-frame? We reframe\ncontext in the way that we give another meaning to a statement by\nchanging the context or our focus to something.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Example: \u201cMy 14-years old teen is too melancholic” – \u201cwon\u2019t you be happy that she’ll be able to be consistent, persistent, generous, and take care of you since he’s very emphatic person that yo can not say for your son who you say is totally opposite and very self-oriented, egocentric<\/em> \u2026?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Example : \u201cMy superior\nalways comes to me when he wants to share his personal frustrations\nwith staff and fact that his not happy with some colleagues’\nperformance but has no courage telling them himself. I personally\ndon’t like to participate in these gossips” – \u201cWell, I\nunderstand complexity of the situation but your superior than must\nhave confidence in your abilities to deal with this issue and she\ntrusts you so much!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Example:\nYou’re stuck in a traffic jam and are going to be late for a\nmeeting and get worried, angry,overwhelmed with anxiety what your\nboss will tell you. Yes, traffic jam is a fact – How can you use the\nsituation instead of putting yourself into negative emotional state?\nFirst, you can relax and put some music on and plan what to say to\nyour angry boss and how to up on things over the course of the day. <\/em>\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Example:\nYour husband is calling you to tell you he won’t be able to take\nyou to a dinner tonight due to fact that is boos asked him to join\nhim a dinner with business partners. How about surprising some of\nyour friends by asking them to join you to cinema or to have a pizza\ntogether. Or deciding that this is an opportunity to start reading a\nbook or doing something that will make you happy. <\/em>\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Example:\nYour friendship with your best friend is over for whatever reason.\nThis is the fact . What you can do is first, feeling sorry for\nyourself or being angry with the other person. Isn’t it better using\nthe freedom it gives you for a personal makeover, engage into new\nhobby, give your career or family extra attention? Think about this. <\/em>\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hence, in\nreframing you choose what an event means to you.<\/strong> When things\ngo wrong you search for what is good about the situation and give\nthat most attention and focus on that aspect because there is always\nsomething good in any bad or negative circumstance. <\/strong>You look for\nhow you can use the situation rather than be a victim of it! It’s as\nsimple as that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reframing is not about simply denying ”state of the fact” as many argue because you don’t deny anything \u2013 you do not deny traffic jam, or bad weather, or whatever in terms of the meaning of the event , but rather give different context to an event. As a matter of fact you fully acknowledge that “Yes, I’d prefer if I had not taken a bank loan with such a huge interest rate and now worried and anxious” . On the other hand, you also acknowledge that you have a choice in how you respond to this reality. Yes, I can choose to feel worried, anxious, angry or whatever. Or, I can focus on the advantages of the situation and actively search for how to make this situation benefit me.<\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remember, that in all stages in life we have choice in how we are affected by events and what meaning we gonna give to something or someone. Hence, it’s not the event itself that affects us emotionally. What affect us is how we respond to the event.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Therefore,\nwe could consider reframing as an art of actively choosing our\nresponse that will empower rather than weaken us, meaning we can opt\nnot to engage in regretting or resenting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\nIf\na problem can’t be solved within the frame it was conceived, the\nsolution lies in reframing the problem !<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, it\ntakes a bit of practise to get into the re framing habit as your life\nstyle but what other alternatives do you have? Do you prefer to see\nyourself as a victim of circumstances or to see new options and\nopportunities in such circumstances a circumstances? \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know\nwhat I choose. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What\nabout You? \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We can not solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them \u2013 A. Einstein Yes, it’s true that a life can be quite tough throughout our lives. 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